April 22, 2009

Bleeding Makes Me Tired

I have not had coffee in the apartment for days. I don't know why I let myself run out but I do and am forced to get out of bed and not have hot caffeine goodness to seduce me into staying out of bed.

So at the Think Haus (previously Hamilton Hackers but the name was changed and I hate the new name but what can ya do when you live in a shoe?) I excitedly helped myself to two lovely cups of the deliciousness. Awwww yeah.

It was a good meeting, a possible location has been found and will be checked out soon. It's very cool and because of the size, there are so many possibilities. What would you do if you had thousands of square feet at your disposal? Exactly.

Umm I'm tired. No coffee and this happens to be my week... my week to sleep... that week.

I have to read a crap-load of stuff still and give my feedback. I have to... oh guess what...

ODSP is giving me transportation to the local YWCA. I can go fifteen times a month (about 2x/week) so that's awesome. I'm gonna swim and do weight training stuff. So that's good news.

I don't wanna jinx it, but there's a real possibility that the new increase in my meds is doing something good. I'm still miserable as fuck and scared shitless to make any promises to myself, but I have noticed an increase in energy and motivation/will. We shall see.

I've been having bad dreams though. I'd say for the past month now. Not really nightmares, but bad dreams. They all relate to fears I have in real life about abandonment and a certain person.

My living room is still in upheaval but I put all my most used/favourite art supplies right next to my desk so they're right there ready to go all the time, which makes my life easier because I need to make the art. I needs to.

Oooh marylin.ca is finally pointing to the right server! FINALLY!!! So I'm gonna be uploading the site within the next few days and my website will finally be back in action.

I hope the warm weather comes and stays very soon cause I have a summer plan. Well, not really a plan so much as an agenda of sorts. It involves a backpack, an mp3 player, a camera, a notebook, a sketchbook, a bus pass, and a comfy pair of shoes among other things. Pretty self-explanatory.

Bah, I'm grumpy. and this blog post sucks.

P.S. Downtown Hamilton does not have a cafe. WTF?

-Love Marylin


  1. I wish it'll be warmer for ya soon. Ya outting sounds like it'll be just thing ya need. I hope ya doing well. Big Hugs~

  2. {{{Marilyn}}} Sorry...hope ODSP freaks me out and treats YOU well. I've never dealt with them, but have plenty of acquaintances who curse the ground those people walk on.

    Sorry you don't like the 'new' (and totally unofficial until the paperwork has been accepted by the authorities***, IIUC). Give it a chance to (potentially) grow on you - if indeed the need even arises. Until we hear from James next Tuesday...or here.

    We had one "THIS" backronym, and one "SHIT" backronym. I'm hoping some budding poet who don't know it (yet) will help me figure out an extension of the base (Think Haus/THIS) into a backronym for "THIS-N-THAT" - WHAT could be a more accurate moniker (other than maybe, "THIS SHIT")? That would likely not be an (instantly, at least) obvious acronym/backronym to a non-geek...and, of course, no problem to those we're TRYING to *draw*. ;)

    And I propose that the first GBCW'er be required, before storming off into the sunset, to come up with a legitimate backronym for "FSCK THIS!" ;) Preferably fsck.ext4 ::devil horns:: .

    Even being mad can be fun (unlike depression; I'm a fellow sufferer, it's PITA, and you have my empathy).

    *** ALWAYS question authority - unless doing so will get your boodie in mega-trouble with your FRIENDS. :)

    And, OF COURSE, colour WITHIN THE LINES...and use spelchek... :(

    I didn't mention it Tuesday night, but my apartment deadbolt broke at 9PM Saturday night (at the height of the huge thunderstorm, at that). Called the landlord, waited 1/2-hr, finally decided to holler at our on-site "super" (ie, the tenant on ODSP who can't supplement their income legally, so Bud pays them about $5/hr. or something for pricey crap like snow and ice removal). FWIW: He and I DO NOT get along.

    The super actually did an impressive job kicking my door in w/o causing to much damage; I think we can even "patch" the jamb. But I've had an unlockABLE place since Saturday night.

    I went to Think Haus leaving that door wide unlocked in a bad neighborhood (not that I didn't take other measures to protect my "valuables" {sic}). Nice thing when most of your "valuables" are worn out sportswear from a long-dropped hobby, and WORSE, not much is of ANY 'value' to anyone else - and PERFECT for the shop! Need a painter? I've got about 2-3 dozen shirts ready to sacrifice!

    Sorry, Marylin, for the O/T meandering. I'm gonna go start a new topic now. But I think this type of interaction is good - we're still mostly in the "getting to know you: stage on all sides. Fortunately, I know two of the others (one very vaguely)

    Peace, Love, HOPE...Keith


Thanks for reading <3